Everyone is welcome to the feast, everyone is welcome in our community, everyone is welcome, come as you are. But because I didn’t specifically mention people of all sexualities, listeners assumed, even knew that I wasn’t referring to LGBTIQ+ people.
This unspoken understanding of my fake inclusion was proven to me after I resigned. After I told the church that I was fully inclusive of all sexualities in the church, three mothers came to me and told me that they had a gay child. Despite my regular comments that all are welcome, all three of them told me that they were afraid to tell me because they didn’t know what I thought. Another person told me, not long after I resigned, that they themselves were bisexual and kept it a secret from me in case I removed them from ministry. This is how the LGBTIQ+ community heard me say, “All are welcome.”
Excerpt from “Removing The Plank,” my soon to be released book about privilege, sexuality and the church.